Customer Letter: Why Does My Dentist Keep Looking at the Window?
This month’s letter comes from a patient who signs herself “Concerned of Cornwall Road”, a fictional location that we have decided is real.
Dear Dr Calloway. At my last appointment, you spent most of the time looking out of the window. I felt a little ignored. Is this normal?
The reply
Dear Concerned,
Thank you for writing. First, let me assure you that you were not ignored. You were observed in the periphery, which is a more refined form of attention. A cat who looks directly at another cat’s teeth is being rude. A cat who looks at a window is being respectful.
What I was looking at
During your appointment I noticed a sparrow on the fence. It remained there for eleven minutes. I did not want to disturb it, so I kept completely still, and in the meantime I examined your teeth with my paws and a general feeling of goodwill.
Is this a recognised technique?
It is recognised by me. In my years of practice, which have been numerous and largely unsupervised, I have found that patients who feel looked at become tense. Patients who feel unobserved relax, and their teeth become more cooperative. This is why we use the window, the plant and the ceiling.
What you can do
- Look at the window yourself, and enjoy the sparrow
- Try not to say “ah” too loudly, as it startles the fish
- Remember that your teeth are fine and the sparrow is not your concern
- If you feel overlooked, simply wave a paw
A closing thought
I have been a dentist for as long as I have been awake. In that time I have learned that the best care is gentle, distant and slightly confused. Your next visit will be exactly the same. I look forward to seeing you, or at least to not seeing you, from a comfortable angle.
Warm regards,
Dr Tuft Calloway
Please note that this letter is a parody and does not constitute real dental advice. If your real teeth hurt, please see a real dentist.
